March 12, 2007
March Mild Sociopathic Personality Disorder
[Click the thumbnail, then on "all sizes" for a view where you can actually read my picks. As the caption on the main photo indicates, doing so legally obligates you to remit 15% of your office/homeless shelter/friendly pool winnings to me, whether you use the picks or not. Offer not valid in Kentucky; I don't accept squirrel pelts as payment.]
A few miscellaneous thoughts on the upcoming NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament (UPDATE: Arkansas upsets USC in the first round), which is for my money the best playoff system in modern sports, apart from the triple elimination All-Scandinavia curling free-for-all:
1. John Thompson the Third? Patrick Ewing, Jr.? Where the hell have I been? It's always good to see the Georgetown Hoyas doing well, in no small part because of 7'2" Roy Hibbert, who is the son of Dr. Julius Hibbert and the 50-Foot Woman.
2. I'd like to have Texas advance beyond the Sweet 16, but that would be premised on anybody apart from best player in the country Kevin Durant shooting more than 1-for-13 from the field in three consecutive games, which I don't expect to happen. Too bad his dynasty only lasts for this year. I also predict that he will be picked second, behind 38-year-old Ohio State phenom Greg Oden, even though he's more accomplished at this point. Enjoy the Bobcats and Celtics, fellas!
3. I fucking hate Duke and Texas Tech and this has partially motivated by having them lose in the first round. I also don't much particularly care for Florida coach Billy Donovan, who looks like an extra in The Brothers McMullen.
4. I wish I could pull the trigger for an upset by the 15th seeded Islanders of Texas A&M-- Corpus Christi. You may belong to a dump of a university system, but you can at least get decent seafood on your campus. Ditto the 15th seeded Green Wave of North Texas, except that I have nothing good to say about Denton.
5. Sorry, women's basketball fans. No Lady Horns in the tournament, no care*. Also, take your NIT shit elsewhere, despite the (anticipated) presence of my beloved Cougar High (University of Houston).
6. Hey, Yao Ming's back (37 points against the Magic today). I fully predict that the Rockets will win their first round series against the Jazz, lose to the top-seeded Mavericks, and then I'll stop caring about that.
Discuss all things roundball in the comments. I must have some college-educated people in my readership, or at least people who can pretend to care about their local tourney-bound squad! Come on, you're only damning yourselves as uneducated small-town hicks with your silence!
* UPDATE: A fond farewell to Hall of Fame coach women's basketball coach Jody Conradt, as she leaves with 900 wins and one national championship during a trailblazing 38-year career.
This is, without question, my favorite sporting event of the year. Some initial thoughts:
-Norb, what do you have against the USC-Arkansas game? Hoping for a rain-out or something?
-Nice to see I'm not the only one picking Winthrop and VCU (fuck Duke right in the ear!), though I'm having a hell of a time picking my 5-12 upset. I guess Illinois is the best bet, but they looked awful against Wisconsin, and Wisconsin looks like a tie for the worst 2-seed with...
-"Meh"mphis...If Nevada doesn't beat 'em, Louisville will.
-You're hating on TX Tech, but having eATMe beat Louisville? I'm confused.
-Bold prediction! Texas beats UNC! (then goes down in a blaze of mediocrity vs. G'Town, goddammit)
-I am PISSED that Kansas and UCLA are in the same region...they were half of my final four picks earlier in the year. Of course Wisconsin and OK-State were the other two, so what do I know?
-Texas or Oregon in the Final Four would be outstanding, but then, so would Karl Rove getting hit by a meteorite.
Final Four: Florida, Kansas, Georgetown, Louisville
Final: Kansas v. Georgetown, Kansas wins
(I should note that I'm one of those bastards that fills out more than one bracket...sorry, but life's too short not to hedge your bets)
Posted by: funkyb0ss at March 11, 2007 08:56 PMOops, didn't see your note on flickr...I see you have the ol' "pick EVERY 5-12 upset" strategy going...ballsy.
Posted by: funkyb0ss at March 11, 2007 09:21 PMI care nothing about this. I do miss your coupon posts. As time goes by I miss them more.
Posted by: thebewilderness at March 11, 2007 10:45 PMYour East bracket is especially ballsy. I'm having a hard time deciding between UNC and Texas, but I think the winner there comes out of the bracket.
Virginia over OSU is particularly testicular. I may have to steal that one.
Posted by: Otto Man at March 12, 2007 05:42 AMgo ahead and pick A&M-CC, Wisconsin isn't going far without Butch, though i like how the committee always gives teams a chance for payback (UW brought down UNLV on their last trip to the Final Four). I'm sure they're salivating over an OSU/Florida rematch.
My beloved Miami of Ohio gets to be roadkill for Oregon. No Arizona-like upset for them this year.
Posted by: paperpusher at March 12, 2007 07:03 AMi will send you flowers if the rockets get that first round seed and beat the jazz. they must stop that team. they. must.
Posted by: dex at March 12, 2007 08:28 AMpft Texas over Kansas 80-79
Posted by: Joker at March 12, 2007 08:54 AMMarch without Syracuse? A travesty.
Posted by: Frederick at March 12, 2007 09:02 AM"Cougar High"? Dude, it's been TWENTY years since I've heard that! (Still makes me giggle.)
Posted by: Clio Bluestocking at March 12, 2007 09:22 AMI must have some college-educated people in my readership, or at least people who can pretend to care about their local tourney-bound squad!
I'm college-educated, but I can't pretend to care about college sports. I'm glad you're enjoying this lacrosse tournament or whatever it is, though.
Posted by: Tom Hilton at March 12, 2007 10:26 AMNothing good to say about Denton, eh? What about the fact that we have two Taco Buenos?
Filth
Posted by: Filth at March 12, 2007 11:25 AMIs this about golf or something?
Posted by: billy pilgrim at March 12, 2007 12:13 PMEven though my heart lies in the NFL, nothing touches March Madness.
Interesting bracket. I think Ohio State will get bounced for the same reason as Texas -- no one else can step up. But I think it will be the Vols that bust up that section.
You're right about Oden's appearance -- he looks like old LeBron from the Nike commercials. He should complete the look and sport the Kareem goggles and short shorts.
I like Southern Illinois to get to the Sweet 16 and then play Kanasas in the lowest scoring defensive slugfest since the shot clock started.
Memphis screwed me in Vegas last year, so I will never trust them again. Plus Conference USA is like sitting at the kids table. You have to show me you can use metal knives and forks before I'll trust you to eat with the big people.