September 27, 2006

"And Though I Came to Jeer At You, I Leave Now With Regrets"

A lot of people rather than things in this week's edition. I may not have gotten all of them right, so feel free to re-caption as many pictures as you want after clicking on the thumbnail for a larger, context-revealing picture. However, if you do enjoy one or two of the below offerings, feel free to share your affinity in the comments. I personally like #9, and the caption's pretty subtle too. #11 is the most inspired, though.

1. Look, I already told you people that I can't raise the dead!

2. Well, this Barbie grew up in a fundamentalist household and eventually decided to pose for a lot of spanking pictures.

3. The Pentagon recently paid $17 million a piece for 21st century Viewmasters.

4. These days, "Great Balls of Fire" just means that he can't perform sitting down any more.

5. The old "I just ate a big handful of peanut butter and can't answer your question right now" routine is beginning to wear a little thin with the White House press corps.

6. [Practice picture!]

7. The interview would resume 30 minutes later after Chris Wallace had retired to a broom closet, yelling "BAD TOUCH! BAD TOUCH!!!"

8. And this model here will never talk back, even when you've been doing a shitty job for 5 or 6 years!

9. Pretty sneaky, Hugo.

10. Just when you thought it was safe to enter the saffron field...

11. New World Order, take two.




Posted by Norbizness at September 27, 2006 12:13 AM
Comments

Practice: "Missy gave me a drawing that said 18 inches. Now, whether or not she knows the difference between feet and inches is not my problem. I do what I'm told."

Posted by: ianovich at September 26, 2006 09:59 PM

What, the original picture/caption combo for number six wasn't surreal enough?

Posted by: binky at September 26, 2006 10:04 PM

1. Regardless of their 29 points of personal connection, Match.com doesn't work for everyone.

2. "Look out behind you, Barbie! Katherine Harris!"

3. Oh damn, when did we start using Wehrmacht helmets?

4. Tell me Jerry Lee couldn't still take Simon Cowell in a knife fight.

5. "Hey perfesser! You chug a bottle of NyQuil, get up here, and see how smart you look!"

6. I think Gnarls Barkley may have jumped the shark.

7. Chris Wallace, putting the "bitch" into "bitch slap."

8. "Stars and garters, don't you at least have a homicidal despot I can shake hands with?"

9. What the hell did the Chinese embassy do to deserve that?!

10. Some species are better at hide-n-seek than others.

11. [crickets] I got nothing.

Posted by: Decker at September 26, 2006 10:54 PM


6. Actually, I don't think I can handle that ga-donk-a-donk-donk.

I liked Norb's #4 cuz I'm lowbrow, #7 was pretty good, and #9 has its merits. Both Norb's and Decker's #1 rule as well. Actually all of Decker's pwn.

Posted by: Montag at September 26, 2006 11:21 PM

1. "I must have heard wrong; I didn't know this was a conference for *Lame-o's*. Never mind; where's the keg?"

2. "No! More! Miniature! Wire! Hangers!"

3. I want to know what genius gave PFC Ray Charles a missile launcher.

4. Apparently, the whole lotta shakin' goin' on is palsy!

5. After answering each question from the press, the president demands to be thrown tasty nuggets of salmon.

6. "Yes, I know the gum tastes like blueberry pie, but please stop chewing it! I haven't worked all the bugs out yet!"

7. "I did not have sex with that Osama Bin Laden!"

8. "And this is our coalition of the willing!" "Ooo, he's very dapper!"

9. I wish they all could be Cali cartel girls.

10. "Where's that Banksy? I'm gonna kick his ass!"

11. "I'm sorry, sir; the shaking of one's bon-bon is still illegal in Alabama."

Posted by: HWRNMNBSOL at September 27, 2006 09:27 AM

No. 2 is awesome. I'm completely uninspired this week, though.

Posted by: Tom Hilton at September 27, 2006 11:52 AM

#6 - Worst. Gobot. Evah.

Posted by: Nancy in Detroit at September 27, 2006 11:53 AM

A Procol Harum Live with Guys in Tuxedos Getting Scale ref! You could not die, only conquer!

Posted by: roy edroso at September 27, 2006 05:50 PM

PRACTIC PICTURE 6: After peak oil, chicks go wild for a man driving a fart powered minihummer.

Posted by: Ronald Brak at September 28, 2006 05:49 AM

Practice:

"When Peter Jackson decided to make 'King Kong 2: The Missus' with Hype Williams, we all knew it was trouble..."

Posted by: drew at September 29, 2006 04:26 PM

1. "Live conduit to the Buddha-mind I may be but, so help me, if she does that snort-laugh one more time ... "

2. The Rose McGowan Barbie? Does she come with a Marilyn Manson Ken-- oh, wait ...

3. "You're supposed to put the viewfinder up to your eye, Marine, not in it!"

4. The climactic scene of "Rock-and-Roll Raiders of the Lost Ark."

5. Poorly-Executed Robert DeNiro Impression #2942803: "Yes, Mr. President, we are talking to you."

6. [Holy fuck, Batman!] Automobile by Tonka, Fashions by Hefty Bag.

7. "Does this bother ya? How 'bout this? How 'bout this? Does that bother ya? Yeah-- try that for eight fuckin' years and see how ya like it!"

8. "When your current stock of 'Yes Bots' start wearing down, know that you've got a supplier of quality replacements ready, built on the cheap with proud Albanian labor."

9. I've heard the adage about getting more bees with honey, but ... goddamn.

10. "Dun-DUN dun-DUN dun-DUN dun-DUN ... this is SO cool! If I could somehow put my ears up like a fin ... "

11. "I don't know what Mr. Martin is saying, but his pomade smells delicious."

Posted by: Sandman at September 30, 2006 04:23 PM