September 06, 2006
"Hey! Wait a Minute! These Captions Weren't Double-Bolted!"
That's right, it's straight-up classy captions this week to liven up yer Wednesday. As you are well aware, you can click on the thumbnails for a larger, context-revealing pic, try your hand at developing your own captions (especially #6, the practice picture), and tell me your favorites in the comments. I think I'll go for numbers 1 and 4, as I am a sucker for Devo and RenFest references.
1. 
Well, Tina, to answer your question, I'm a man on a mission. I'm a boy with a gun. I got a picture in my pocket of the lucky one.
2. 
OK, now give me one that says "Sensible Tarriffs Policy Now!"
3. 
Ahhhh, nothing beats the feel of a human-skin rug.
4. 
Becometh thee ready to throweth the legs of muttone at the newe couppel!
5. 
Celebrating the bicentennial of do-it-yourself proctology.
6. 
[Practice photo time! I know it's not the pick of the litter, that's why you should also go to town on the other pictures.]
7. 
That ain't makeup. He just went face-first into the Craft Services desert cart.
8. 
And then the little boy in the striped shirt who broke the Junior Free Speech Enclosure barrier was quickly whisked away by the Secret Service.
9. 
Man, they runnin' out of shit to baptize.
10. 
Super-sized cup of kitty litter with chunklets? I'm lovin' it!
11. 
I want my money back! She don't do nothin', just sits there all day on her pink comforter with her stuffed animals!
PRACTICE PICTURE 6: Although some are pessimistic about Japan's economic prospects, these Mitsubishi workers say the box is half full.
Posted by: Ronald Brak at September 6, 2006 12:38 AM6. Though he could still rock out, Yoshi realized that his groupies weren't what they once were back in the day
Posted by: Pope Impious XXIII at September 6, 2006 09:34 AM#2 - The Draft Board also accepted the enlistments of PFC's He Hate Me, Corrosion of Conformity and Death from Above.
#8 - Look, Laura, this one's trying to say something!
Posted by: paperpusher at September 6, 2006 12:35 PM1. By Grabthar's Hammer, what savings!
4. O.K., we found our Fiona, but we really gotta get a better Shrek for this live action version.
5. "If his chest had been a cannon, he would have shot his heart upon it." -- the inspiration for Herman Melville's earlier work, Muddy Dick.
6. Sure, the birth of an heir to the Chrysanthemum Throne gives new hope to the Japanese right wing, but they really went too far by digging up those Comfort Women.
8. George Bush reaches out to his remaining few supporters: freaky white families with nine children.
9. Once bitten, twice shy, the producers of "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin's documentary allow it to continue to be filmed, although it will be renamed as "The Ocean's Most Dangerous Animal Breaths".
11. My husband -- some hotshot! (This is the real Ancient Chinee Secret.)
I like Norb's #9.
Posted by: arghous at September 6, 2006 12:42 PMI've got nothing this week, but I had to tip my hat to one of the more obscure Simpsons references in the title. Well played, JB.
Posted by: Otto Man at September 6, 2006 01:07 PM1. Top Gun II further eroded Tom Cruise's box office appeal when movie goers began to experience spontaneous combustion and an overpowering desire to take his breath away.
Posted by: vachon at September 6, 2006 02:00 PM1. One of the failed auditions for the Blue Man Group.
2. Tattooing secret maps on your skull doesn't work out quite so well when you shave your melon all the time...
3. The proposed cover for this years Naked Bears calendar.
4. Tom and Katie always wanted a fairy tale wedding...
5. "You should see the crap that some people burn these days!"
6. Soma rations are shown being distributed to participants in Japan's Brave New World simulation.
7. Sadly, Rocky can only beat himself up in the latest sequel.
8. Young dissenters are taught early to see the world from behind bars.
9. "Whoa! Back off on the frisky business while the cameras are focused on us, honey..."
10. Not everyone seems impressed with the new McDonald's Coal Tar shake.
11. Korean knockoffs just don't do the sex slave thang as good as the originals. Buy American, and do it right!
Posted by: (: Tom :) at September 6, 2006 02:00 PM3. In a predawn raid today, Federal wildlife agents today confiscated what they describe as 'the world's largest stash of animal porn...'
4. Hey, I may be drunk, but I'm not as drunk as you were when you picked out these outfits.
5. Italian movie star Ricardo della Lesbia, in a still from the Cinecitta-produced remake of Mary Poppins.
6. Japan's porcelain shortage reaches crisis proportions...
8. In a surprise visit to Guantanamo, President Bush takes some time to chat with America's littlest detainees.
9. Okay, okay, I take it back--whales really are smarter than dolphins.