Happy Furry Puppy Story Time with Norbizness

Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas-Time!

The Left is committing holiday fashion blunders!

It's been a busy holiday season; in addition to donning gay apparel (see above), The Left has been bad and internation-wide, spreading a toxic gospel of tolerance for everybody but white, affluent Christians. You can see my previous weeks' exploits in one easy-to-read category. Remember: all quotes are real (some are grammatically adjusted to reflect that The Left is a single person) and taken from sites discovered through this Google search.

(1) Those of us who thought that the Left had been defeated in 1989 were mistaken. Totalitarian Leftism has made a comeback through Multiculturalism. It hurts us all in our rights and way of living. This shows the true reach of my power; this post is from The Netherlands. And I had been temporarily defeated in 1989, but I recovered from the poisoned Bartles & Jaymes wine cooler.

(2) The derogatory assumptions, baseless accusations, irrelevant arguments, confusing of personal crotchets with public policy - all delivered with the bile and venom I've come to expect from The Compassionate and Caring Left. Call me crazy, but I don't think this guy believes I'm compassionate and caring at all.

(3) No wonder The Left is waging a war on Christmas. That's patently ridiculous; I bought my brother a cane with a concealed knife and my aunt a handful of sand to throw in somebody's face to celebrate Karl Rove's birthday.

(4) One of the things that's gone wrong for The Left is that their girls just aren't cute any more. I want to prove this guy wrong, but in order to do so, I'm going to need lots and lots of pictures.

(5) Can someone explain why it is that 14 year old girls do not need to notify parents or get permission for an abortion but 17 and 18 year olds must have parental permission before speaking to a recruiter? This is exactly the kind of twisted liberal stupidity that The Left is always involved in. I'll do my best, but I can't quite remember exactly when I formulated this policy. I think it's because I love abortions and hate the military so much that I won't let them put together armies of children like Namibia or The Crusades.

(6) We have seen other examples of The Left infusing religion into the schools, [he does] so when it [his] their radical agenda, to wipe out the influence of Christianity, and keep students far removed from Christian moral values. We have seen where students were openly taught witchcraft, where liberals support Harry Potter books being placed in the schools for students to read, but they want to keep the idea of intelligent design far away from the students minds.

This is truly an impressive laundry list; it's good to know that a single, slacker 30-something in Austin is making children read Harry Potter books. I keep wondering when the checks from Ms. Rowling and the film studios are going to roll in. Bonus factoid: the name of the site is "Protest The Left." Thanks to advanced technology which masks my compound from the prying eyes of spy satellites, nobody's found the Fortress of Crapulence just yet to set up said protests.

If and when these real Americans comes to force some sort of economic embargo where I'm unable to get my RDA of Tex-Mex, I will trigger the subcutaneous microchip/homing devices embedded in each of my minions' forearms, hopefully facilitating the final battle between the righteous and the Harry Pooter fans. Stay tuned; it should be an interesting 2006.

Posted by Norbizness at December 27, 2005 11:06 AM