August 24, 2005
Have It The True Father's Way
In light of the popularity of cataloging Pat Robertson's career of convincing people there is no just God, I thought we'd move to the quiet billionaire power behind the throne. Of course, I don't want to play the role of an anti-religious bigot or anything. I would merely point out that the guy who excreted the following quotes owns United Press International, the Washington Times, gets coronated in bipartisan ceremonies that take place on Capitol Grounds, gave former President Bush $100,000 for a speech in South America, and is receiving faith-based abstinence funds from the current Administration:
(1) Satan is clinging to our sexual organs and pushes us to use them. Satan's work now is to try to get us to misuse the sexual organ. Westerners may think they have much to impress me with but I have gone beyond that. We must restore the fall and go beyond the misuse of the sexual organs.
(2) That is not all. The spirit world is one step ahead of us in breaking open the age of the peace kingdom. Starting with the five great saints, more than 120 billion blessed families are working day and night to cooperate with us on earth and prepare for the day that is to come.
(3) What is marriage? Marriage is finding the rightful master of your most holy place of love. It's like positive and negative charges finding one another. At the opportune time they form a circuit and thunder and lightning result. Which is the place of sexual intercourse? The sexual organ.
(4) Moon announced that he would save everyone on Earth as he had saved the souls of even such murderous dictators as Hitler and Stalin, who he claimed had received "the Blessing" through him. Moon said the reformed Hitler and Stalin vouched for him from the spirit world, calling him "none other than humanity's Savior, Messiah, Returning Lord and True Parent."
(5) Gay rights groups resent his uncompromising calls for a heterosexual-only society. Moon is implacably opposed to homosexuality, calling gays "dung-eating dogs" who would have no place in a "peace kingdom."
(References here, here, and especially here). Along with NASCAR, Scientology, Catholicism, and Oprahism, we are truly losing our way as Americans. Time to go back to basics with Zoroastrianism. They may only be 140,000 strong, and you may not be able to join the religion, but they've got an Ahura Mazda, the Japanese economy car of all-powerful deities.
I had no idea that the Burger King was so damn political!
I love the quote, "Moon said the reformed Hitler and Stalin vouched for him from the spirit world..." I mean, if [reformed]Hitler and Stalin endorse you, what more could you want? Have any reformed evil dead people have endorsed Bush?
Norb--
I emailed you a clip of the CNN segment. Two, actually, but the second one is the complete one.
I hope you go over it frame by frame like the Zapruder film.
i always liked that story about how our forefathers came here to escape religious persecution. now religions come here to persecute.
Posted by: paperpusher at August 24, 2005 01:53 PMObviously, this should be taught in the public schools. There are many 'theories' of sex, and our sex education classes should expose students to all of them and let them decide for themselves.
Posted by: Charles Watkins at August 24, 2005 02:09 PM"i always liked that story about how our forefathers came here to escape religious persecution. now religions come here to persecute"
Don't kid yourself; many of our esteemed forefathers (including some of mine) came here in the 1600's, jumped right in with the persecuting, and haven't stopped yet.
It's a sacred American tradition, y'know.
Posted by: andante at August 24, 2005 02:13 PMitems #2 & #3 are identical...
Posted by: jam at August 24, 2005 02:36 PMMy bad, although I may have replaced #3 with the lyrics from a Barry White song. I'm not sure.
Posted by: norbizness at August 24, 2005 02:42 PMI like how he punctuates a discussion of sexual organs with the phrase "Westerners may think they have much to impress me with...." Sheesh! Does this guy have body issues or what!
Posted by: rod at August 24, 2005 04:40 PMYou know we're screwed when the FCC goes after a chick for baring a nipple...but doesn't bat an eyelash at a guy calling for the assasination of a foreign head of state.
If Hugo Chavez was a fetus..we'd be prolife. Stupid post womb Venezuelan, anyway.
Posted by: carla at August 24, 2005 04:43 PM