Happy Furry Puppy Story Time with Norbizness

I dunno, Peggy, maybe it's just the non-liquified neurons and synapses talking here, but I've got a couple issues with this one. Not that I actually care even the slightest bit what happens to one woman in Florida, since from all the available evidence, I gather she doesn't care either, but it's less a matter of being "half in love with death" than of wanting the person I chose to make my legal partner to make decisions in my interest than the freaks I happen to have gotten stuck with in the genetic crapshoot.
As for the whales, I don't suppose that the magic dolphin lady has noticed there are far fewer whales than humans, and that whales don't generally kill people. When they start threatening us, I'll start making Save The Humans posters and stop worrying about ceticide.
And, oh yeah. The facets of my life that make me feel "sad, pained, frustrated, and angry", increasingly those have a lot to do with the fact that whackjobs like you are currently destroying most of what I kinda liked about the whole planet, so, you know, looking at another four years or so of this, and I actually am not all that sure I *am* still glad I'm alive.
But, that's probably because I don't live my live in a rosy alcoholic glow. Glad it seems to be working out for you, though.

Kid, I bin watchin' people throw at the broad side of th' barn for thirty five years and that's the first time I ever seen one demolished with a casual toss. Somebody get the radar gun.

Even presuming science could reconstruct the part of her brain that is currently spinal fluid, you could never replicate what was once there. Or, to put it in a more religious way, Terri's soul left her body a long time ago, and watching her soulless husk twitch and gurgle is as creepy as creepy goes.

I think there's something biological going on here, some ingrained response to fear that makes people want to 'fight for life.' They don't care about Terri. They just need the emotional reward they seem to get.

"And those who are still learning--our children--oh, what terrible lessons they're learning."

why is it that the 19,000 dead via our armed forces in a ferren' land fail the schiavo litmus test when this mob blathers on about the culture of life? am i wrong here, or am i eating crazy pills?

btw, great post, norb.

Hmm, nice how she evoked Columbine without mentioning the school shooting this week.

I third Dexter's comment. Great post.

If only those stupid hippies would stop caring about nature and resources and available food and peaceful solutions and 3rd world debt and focus on LIFE!!!!

I suppose the main reason this is all so compelling is that it represents a microcosm of trying to debate fundamentalists. I can trot out doctor after doctor to prove my point, but they can always counter with "But I BELIEVE". Ugh....

last night on the news they played a soundbite of bush saying something like "in matters like these we must err on the side of life. and we are." i was like "shit yeah you are. erring right and left, motherfucker." (pardon my french i realize the french aren't welcome in this most holiest blog of patriotic fervor.)

xoxo, jared

Excellent post.

How do you manage to read these columns without experiencing complete loss of equilibrium, projectile vomiting, or certain sexual side effects?

Jared: That's Jesus' General.

Spencer: I smoke a lot of pot so I forget sooner.

The Noonster's recipe for peace in the "Mideast":

"In a similar spirit, let me say that if Steven Spielberg went to the Mideast tomorrow, announced he was making a movie, and sent out a casting call for males age 12 to 30 he would immediately establish a new Mideast peace, at least for the length of the shoot. Because the only thing the young men there would rather do than kill each other is be a movie star. Hmmmm, a suicide bombing that raises my family's status in the neighborhood or a possible date with Cameron Diaz, let's see . . . Mr. Spielberg would also get a Nobel Peace Prize. I am actually not kidding.)"

I think my eyes just tried to turn backwards in their sockets.

So, she thinks that all fetuses should be brought to life no matter the consequences: whether the baby is grossly deformed beyond redemption, may end in the mother's death, or is borne by a thirteen year old to a life of violence, perversion, and poverty. Yet she is perfectly comfortable with state sponsored murder. Nice piece of work, that one.

In a just world, Peggy Noonan would be in six layers of urine-soaked clothes begging for change outside a Duane Reed while blathering on about Jeebus' love and Molly Ivins would have her job at the WSJ.

Ah, Peggy, upon your death may hordes of winged, hydrocephalic harlequin babies raise you up to that great big bottle of Royal Gate in the sky...

if all those abortionists could just get chosen for parts in a spielberg movie...

"In a similar spirit, let me say that if Steven Spielberg went to the Mideast tomorrow, announced he was making a movie, and sent out a casting call for males age 12 to 30 he would immediately establish a new Mideast peace, at least for the length of the shoot. Because the only thing the young men there would rather do than kill each other is be a movie star. Hmmmm, a suicide bombing that raises my family's status in the neighborhood or a possible date with Cameron Diaz, let's see . . . Mr. Spielberg would also get a Nobel Peace Prize. I am actually not kidding.)"

As if the people predisposed to suicide bombing would ever work for a Jew . . .

You spend your whole life looking for identity and then one day, like a bolt out of the blue, it comes.

I'm a Euthanasia Enthusiast. I AM a Euthanasia Enthusiast! Gentlemen, please begin my subscription to "Kevorkian Fancy" magazine.

What does Terri Schiavo's life symbolize to them?
An existence that ended for all practical purposes 15 years ago?
What does the idea that she might continue to live suggest to them?
That for reasons to me incomprehensible she would continue to languish in a hospice bed with a tube in her stomach for nutrition, unable to move or speak, with no cerebral cortex so that she (mercifully) cannot think, with no hope of any change ever? That this is not a definition of "living" that most people would find appealing?

Once you "know" that--that human life is not so special after all--then everything is possible, and none of it is good. When a society comes to believe that human life is not inherently worth living, it is a slippery slope to the gas chamber.
She's heard of Gov. George W. Bush, right?

Great post, Mr. The Left.

BTW- the Sarah McLachlan cover of that XTC song is quite choice as well.

I never thought Sarah McLachlan gave it justice... too wussy and contrived. Teh XTC version is more raw... and the kid singing the lines just packs a bigger punch.

re Spielberg casting call: I think that the number of actors he would require would grab the last remaining 12-30 year olds that are still alive and walking in Iraq. Just for that reason (not for the reason he would be shot because he's Jewish) he should go for it!

fucked up catholic.

royally fucked up catholic.

no -- IMPERIALLY fucked up catholic.

btw, the local paper said prince ranier of monaco is also in the running to go to the big casino in the sky.

The lady who cuts my hair had the Hannitoad's radio show on today. Sean was chattin' up Judge Roy Moore about the Schiavo case. Moore managed to maintain that none of the judges in this case had been following "the rule of law", that "man's law is not the rule of law", that the Constitution is the highest law in the USA, that judges don't decide what the law is, and that the President is the ultimate authority. If you think some of these things are contradictory or just make no sense whatsoever, rest assured that they sounded no better when Moore was saying them. More than ten minutes and my head would have exploded. Thank god my barber is ridiculously fast.

If you think some of these things are contradictory or just make no sense whatsoever, rest assured that they sounded no better when Moore was saying them.

That's why we keep losing elections. We're too busy trying to come up with justified, rational arguments for things. Clearly the sheeple respond a lot better when you just make shit up and don't bother trying to create clear lines of reasoning.

So Prince Rainier of Monaco is Deep Throat? Man, I have to change my bets in a hurry.

Vestal Vespa, I like your Nooner crazy in the streets Molly Ivins at the WSJ idea. What a world that would be. But following Cleetus, I gotta give the Noony points for the inverse reciprocal alliteration of "enthusiasts for euthanasia." My band just found a name. Norbizness, me likely yr blogging first time poster long time reader. Everybody and anyone else, am I the only one who thinks the logical extension of Pegaloon's argument is that as long as Terri was capable of bearing children it was Michael Schiavo's duty to do his part? Sick, I know but...

Cleetus, I was wondering how much a subscription to "Kevorkian Fancy" would cost. If it's less than $30/year I'm totally getting it. It's in the Time, Inc. consortium, right?
Also, I have been looking for a religion to join and I've decided on joining the cult of death. Does anyone know where to put in an application? I think I would do well in a cult of death, I bet I could work my way up from acolyte to minor priestess in a couple of years.

You folks crack me up. Thanks all!

I got to this particular post via the moderate voice (whoever that is, too many damn blogs to follow)coz he pinged my post on the whole sad affair, and really, after reading her nonsense I had to wonder, why? Why did I waste those seconds, they're gone, dead as it wer.... oh, damn, I'M A CULTIST!!!!!

Sweet morpheus, I bow to your, er, ummmm, .... omnipresense!

Euthanasia Enthusiast. EE like AA?

j fyrste, logical and nooner only go together in cheap motel rooms. I'm thinkin that her whole wedge of the world just skipped right on by the logical thinking banquet table. Her logic has none. She might as well said the slippry slope that leads to vegatable gardening for all the sense it makes.

j. fyrste, I had that same thought. Mayhaps they want to keep her as the symbol for the ultimate christian wife. Doesn't talk back, doesn't buy anything, has no independant thought, thus the perfect womb.

j. fyrste, I had that same thought. Mayhaps they want to keep her as the symbol for the ultimate christian wife. Doesn't talk back, doesn't buy anything, has no independant thought, thus the perfect womb.

These are the people who believe that your soul goes to heaven when you die, if you're good that is, being innocent Terri should go to heaven and be with Jesus, instead of wallowing in a pointless existence, pointless meaning "without any point", I wouldn't think it's too difficult to understand. You think they'd want to free her soul and let her meet Jesus.

And may I ask what this fool thinks that people protest the Iraq war for? Could it be because they don't like to see thousands of people die for bullshit reasons, could it? Hmm? No, it's because of the whales.

I must go now, it's Easter and I have to go and dwell on the image of a bloodied and battered christ on the cross.

Quote from a parallel story: The Smithsonian magazine is running an article on the Scopes trial, and the town of Dayton, Tennessee where it took place. Seems after William Jennings Bryan died, they established a school to teach history per the Bible. ( Bryan College ) They quote the geology perfesser at the school and he sums up the whole fundy thang in one amazingly witless sentance, when he explains how the Earth can be 6000 years old: "Scripture trumps interpretations of physical data."

I want to make
The Beast With Two Backs
with Peggy Noonan.

Afterwards, you can shoot us both.